Mike was telling me about his Low-Carb diet. He was like, �Yeah Leon, it is sweet. I miss out on all these carbs but so far I have lost 7 pounds�. I said, �Yes Mike, I can see your minor weight loss in those double D man titties you are carrying around with you, they look like they have gotten smaller, maybe, if the light is shining correctly�. It wasn�t, they looked like the same old huge titties. But we proceeded with the filming of �Cholesterol 911�

He was flattered, but lost it when he saw me participating in my �Leon diet� which consists of me eating whatever I want and not sitting on my ass and watching it spread like Mikey boy did. We then spent the rest of the day walking around the streets of Washington accosting congressmen and senators. We picked them up and turned them upside down while going through their pockets and looking for loose candy bars. Luckily we got a carton of Ice Cream out of Ted Kennedy�s pants pockets. We also got some rock from his shirt pocket and a flask of Everclear out of his suit. It was sweet and we got blasted and ran around the capital screaming things that were meant to instill panic in all the citizens, but most of the people just stared and called the police. Now that I am sober I probably wouldn�t get scared if I saw a couple of fatties running around screaming �My Left Titty Nipple�s got an eyeball on it�.