We got there and the crowds parted as beautiful me, and these 3 other dudes walked in as mothers and daughters, and even some sons, gawked in amazement at how awesome I was and how I let 3 bitches like that even hang on my coat tails. So anyway, we were walking through the mall looking for the perfect gift for our bitches when Matt let out a shriek that I haven�t heard since I gave my music teacher a little skin flute to blow on. She shrieked and yelled, and then played it for hours. It was awesome, but I must digress.

Matt yelled out in homosexual delight and proclaimed this the gift that will be topped by no other. He yelled out to the top of his lungs, �Ben will forget about that fat whore J-lo and marry me in a heartbeat if I buy him this leopard skin pair of crotch less panties.� The rest of us just calmly walked away agreeing to never again acknowledge the fact that Matt was ever a human being. May God have mercy on his soul.

Next we went to the food court to chow down on some Godiva�s and toss back a couple of Mocha Madness drinks that would make an Irish Sailor call us a bunch of Fags, and he would be right too. Anyway, while we were there I was asking the boys what they would be getting their women for Christmas. George was like, �Well Leon, I will be getting my new underwear model girlfriend a Mercedes and a diamond bracelet, if she doesn�t like the diamond bracelet then she can drive the Mercedes to return it.� Then I look at Brad and he says, �Well Leon, I am getting my woman a pair of slippers and a Dildo. If she doesn�t like the slippers she can take the dildo and go fuck herself.� Then as we all laughed in a boisterous tone I winked at Brad and said, �I would definitely volunteer to be that Dildo�. He got mad but there is nothing he can do, look at me, I am awesome.

Then we finally decided to share our thankful feelings and part ways. Brad leaned back in his chair and said with a sheepish grin, �I am thankful that I have a beautiful woman to talk to and grow old with. I am thankful that I have had a good career and it continues to be great, and I would be really thankful if you would take your hand off of my sac George.� After this little incident we dragged George into the bathroom and kicked the living piss out of him while giving him a time he would never forget. (WINK WINK) As we flushed his head down the toilet we asked if there were anything he was thankful for, and he said, �Lubrication, these past 15 minutes in the Men�s restroom would have been quite difficult without it.�

And finally I said that I was thankful for my awesome abs, my killer sense of humor, my stunning good looks, my huge huge huge huge personality, (WINK WINK) and most of all I was thankful for me, yep just me. Happy Thanksgiving. It should be sweet.